N is for No

I either say No too much or not enough. It never seems like I have a balance of saying No in the right times or right places. Is there a book called The Art of NoI would tell you I’m going to be the one to write it, but I think I’ll say no to that after all. 

The following guidelines are for non life threatening or harmful situations. It’s for the trivial, but also the more serious. It’s written mostly from the perspective of an introvert guarding your social calendar. It’s for the pushover trying to forge boundaries around your preferences. It’s for the passive aggressive to be less passive and more assertive.

Top 10 (Optional) Guidelines of the The Art of No:

  1. You cannot abuse the answer NO.
  2. You can’t just say NO for no good reason, to avoid things that are good for you, or to hide from things that are scary.
  3. Use your NO’s wisely, but please do use it and stop overthinking it.
  4. Based on the top 3 reasons, you are allowed to say NO whenever you see fit.
  5. You are allowed to say YES than change it to a NO. You have the freedom to change your mind at any point in time.
  6. If you don’t want to do it, say NO. But, if it’s good for you in any shape or form, think first.
  7. You are allowed to say NO even when everyone else says YES.
  8. You are allowed to say NO even if everyone else expects you to say YES.
  9. You are allowed to say NO even if it might be a mistake, because there is always that risk no matter answer you end up picking.
  10. And, for crying out loud, let your NO be a NO.

What do you need to say no to?

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